Bye to that US scholarship dream

Maybe I just needed this confirmation before fully surrendering my dream of being accepted to a US University for the Global UGRAD Scholarship for school year 2011-2012. I already foresaw that this will happen but I did not prepare myself much for this moment. Maybe, I just made my self so much excited for my flight bound to US not anticipating the defeat as I download the scholarship form from the e-mail of my professor, Ma'am Data Canlas. Now I just hope that things will go to normal, as for me who was excited for over a month just to see the results.

Yes, I got a non-acceptance letter from Fulbright. But thinking that I was able to reach the interview part, I am still blessed to be chosen from hundreds of aspirants who submitted their application form. I just found the result through a text message from my dad hours ago because they already received the letter at home. Here's his full text message:

Good pm son, natanggap na namin yung result ng exam mo sa Fulbright, at, you were not selected for a grant under 2011-2012. But according to the letter, you can re-apply. Your application will be considered, as before, solely on the basis of the merit of your proposal.

Now I know my dad is also upset, even my family, friends, and professors who were really hopeful that I make it to the US. Maybe I was not that good enough during the application process particularly during the interview phase wherein I committed a major mistake which I wish not to disclose herein. I just told my dad  that I would rather focus on my academics and strive harder to maintain my honor standing.

On the other hand, I am happy because if given the opportunity to stay in the US for a year because of the scholarship, I will not be able to see my family for a year, and God knows how painful that would be for me. If God has plans and reasons for everything, what might be the reason why I was not accepted to this scholarship? Maybe, which I am now anticipating, a bigger surprise awaits me.